As parents, we tend to focus heavily on our children forgetting ourselves or our spouses. Years ago, when my husband and I participated in pre-marital counseling, our therapist told us that children should come after spouse. He meant we needed to put energy into our marriage and into each other to ensure its success. That if we focused on kids more than each other, the relationship would suffer and end.
We resolved to put each other first. We have limped along through some years and thrived through others. We work hard, though, at ensuring that each other's needs are met first. There are seasons of bigger kid needs, so it is harder to accomplish, but the relationship is no less important.
We carved out an evening each week to spend time just with each other. We put our younger kids to bed, kick our older ones out of the living room, and enjoy each other's company. We talk, watch our shows, laugh at silly memes, and just spend time together. We also try to go out away from home a few times a year. That is difficult because of funds, but we try to make it happen. Even just a walk around Target will sometimes suffice. Dates don't need to be fancy and expensive to matter.