I often talk about the lack of support that I had when my kids were all very young. Don't get me wrong, I have loving parents who were always there for me. My husband is and has always been in my corner. Without them, I never could have written my book or gotten these children to where they are now. However, the chaos that was our lives when I had three preschoolers I didn't know how to raise was epic.
My parents had myself and my siblings in close succession too. They struggled with many similar challenges. They had a few people who would watch us on occasion so my mom could have a break. They didn't have a child with severe food allergies or one who screamed for hours on end because his car got bumped. I didn't have people willing to give me a break. Those in my life were scared to kill Mack and did not feel equipped to handle Will's meltdowns. I did have two glorious hours each week while a saint watched my kids in the building for a few years. I felt the same, but had no choice but to press on and survive with these kids whom I'd been blessed with.
No parenting book had advice about Will's meltdowns because they all assumed neurotypical kids who have 15 minutes tantrums. Even as toddlers, we knew these kids were anything but typical. From Rory reading at three, to Will counting at one and losing his control when a toy was slightly askew, to Mack crawling at five months and multiplying at four years, we knew they were something special.
As much as I complained on social media or went to my parents for advice, thinking one of my siblings or myself surely must have acted like this, or went back into my years of babysitting, I couldn't figure out just how to address my children. Social media said six different approaches, all of which I tried, none of which worked. My parents said none of us was quite that intense (or they couldn't remember because, like me, those early years are a bit blurry). None of the kids I had babysat for were anywhere near as extra as mine. Parenting books were no help whatsoever.
So when I claim no support, I mean no one in my life had walked this line. I had no shoulder to cry on. No one said, "oh my son did that. It's impossible". My husband and I wrote the book and invented the wheel for many years. Five years ago, I found my people. While neither of my best friends has kids quite exactly like mine (Will is by far the most intense emotionally), they do have kids who are atypical. They struggle with knowing how to address toddlers who know too much. And school-age kids who can do complex operations but forget pants.
Because I lived through the early years, you can too. Use me for support. I remember a lot of the methods we eventually learned worked for our kids and can tell you how to implement them with your own sweet babies. I still have kids who struggle with a lot of daily life, but we have learned how to meet their needs for social life, school, responsibilities, and more.
Without my husband and parents, I wouldn't have had the ambition to write my book, nor this blog. My parents always made sure I knew I could do anything I set my mind to. I was a stubborn child, and am stubborn now. My husband makes sure I have time to write, collaborate, market, and more. I have throngs of support. I always have. I just didn't have the support of anyone to teach me how to raise these kids. So, I want to be that support for you!